Counselling is not your usual kind of conversation, but one that aims to shed fresh light on your context and your inner world, ultimately helping you to see and be more of your authentic self. This kind of understanding and acceptance also opens the way towards recovery and healing, if that’s what you’re seeking.

The Counselling and therapy approaches I use offer a range of safe gentle ways to explore or resolve the issues you bring. My background is in Narrative and strengths-based Counselling, with many additional trainings over the years in contemporary psychotherapy and mind-body approaches (particularly ACT, Internal Family Systems- IFS, EMDR, and mindful/movement therapies). Each has its usefulness for addressing trauma, anxiety, identity struggles, or other personal or relational challenges you may be facing. We’d discuss what you’re wanting to focus on, and use a tailored approach to help you work towards those goals.

Individuals…

People come to me about a wide range of issues, including-

• stress, anxiety, panic attacks, fears, worries
• trauma-  emotional and physical, and recovery from difficult memories or events
• depression, grief, and coping with loss
• relationship strife and challenges, communication issues
• life questions; finding meaning, purpose, spiritual depth
• problem behaviours, addictions, unwanted thoughts or compulsive habits, …

Everyone’s story is unique; in that light, you and I would discuss your situation, how it’s affecting you, and how you’d prefer things to be. We’d spend time identifying your values and strengths, and plan an approach to suit you and your needs and work towards your goals. Often this begins by tuning in to the various parts or yourself that need understanding, seem to be causing problems, or need help to unburden and heal. Fresh perspective and new hope start to emerge as all the various parts of ‘you’ start to make sense, including your own wise Self. And so begins a process of finding your own true sense of balance-  body, mind and spirit.  Its quite an adventure, and a goal worth pursuing.

Feel free to contact me to book a session, or find out how to begin this process.

Couples…

Relationship therapy has been a focus for me over many years (25+), built on training and experience in Family therapy, dispute mediation and Family Court couple counselling, and the past decade in private practice.  Training in several key Couple Counselling approaches (including Gottman, ACT, Imago, Narrative) means I draw on various tools to deepen communication and heal connection where needed, and work with a wide range of issues, including couple’s struggles to understand and communicate with each other, affairs, conflict, trauma, loss of intimacy and connection. Sessions are relaxed-but-focused, conversational and constructive, aimed at exploring what’s been happening for you both in the relationship, identifying what you may want to develop or change, and building connection and skills to help find your way forward.

The work together is generally practical and solution focused, helping you deepen and understand whatever behaviour patterns or cycles you may be struggling with in the relationship, while  developing your own self-awareness and learning tools for looking after yourself, de-escalation, communication etc as needed.

Relationships aren’t always easy!  Along with my therapeutic training, without a doubt much of my best learning has come from 45+ yrs of married-with-family life, and from the hundreds of brave clients I’ve had the privilege of working with over the years.

Feel free to give me a call or send an email if there’s more you’d like to ask before booking a session.

A bit about me…

I’m originally from Whakatane, of English, Scottish and Maori descent (Waikato Tainui). I’ve lived and raised family in Auckland’s beautiful Waitakere Ranges over many years.

In my twenties I was absorbed in art and lifestyle pursuits, but by mid-life was drawn to working with people. I studied Counselling and Social work, then post-grad studied Family and Couple therapy. The focus was on Narrative, strengths based and solution focused therapeutic work, and it was those respectful, values-honouring approaches to  problems and human nature that started the journey of personal/ professional development for me, and led to the work I now do with individuals and couples.

Early on I spent 8 years with Family Works as counsellor, family therapist and parenting educator, specialising into Family Court counselling and couple mediation, and work with West Auckland stopping-violence networks (WAVES). During that time I enjoyed teaching part-time at Unitec and briefly at Laidlaw in their tertiary counselling programmes. Later, the move to private practice allowed me to deepen my focus on couples work and also trauma recovery with individuals; both areas still hold my interest and keep me busy. It’s satisfying work, a privilege to be meeting at depth with a wide  range of people, each one uniquely teaching me about life, complexity, being human… its constant learning.

I’m a longtime (20yrs) member of the NZ Association of Counsellors (NZAC), which means I have ongoing training and regular supervision of my Counselling and Supervision work as required under the NZAC Code of Ethics.

Contact me to ask a question or book a time; I’ll get back to you asap, usually within 24hrs. (NB. if its urgent please link here to see a list of the available crisis and social service helplines in your area.)

• Email: dtollestrup@gmail.com   
• Phone: 021 2323 863
• Availability: by appt. 10am- 6pm, Tuesday- Friday
• Location:  Online sessions or at Letham Cottage, 35 Jervois Rd, Ponsonby, Auckland
• NZAC Full member.  DipSW. BSocP(Couns). PGDip Couns/Supv. ACC and Family Court registered.
• Fees: Individuals: $150/1hr (+GST) Couples: $200/1.5hrs (+GST). If finances are tight let’s discuss options; feel free to ask me about ACC, WINZ, or other possible subsidies.
• Payment –  invoices are emailed after sessions, for payment online.
• Cancellation (or reschedule): please give 48hrs notice if possible so spaces can be used by others waiting and to avoid a late cancellation fee. Failure to attend a booked session without notice will incur 75% of the full session cost.